I think so many times as adoptive couples we get caught up in our own feelings we forget what our birthmothers are going through.  We all have to write the ‘dear birthmother’ letter that is required but how many of us can really relate to the words we write?  Most of us have never felt the pain, poverty, abuse or addiction some of these girls have experienced.  We have no idea what it feels like to be homeless and hungry with a baby in tow and one on the way.  Now add to those circumstances having to make the decision to place the baby you’ve been carrying for 9 months in the arms of another family.  To see their faces glow with joy while inside you’re dying. To be so desperate your only choice is to give up the precious life that has been growing inside you.  I don’t think most of us have ever experienced that kind of despair and desperation.  After our daughter was born I remember feeling an overwhelming sense of guilt, not wanting to feel like I had taken something she didn’t want to give away.  I struggled for weeks just wanting her to be okay with the decision.  It wasn’t until she visited our daughter a couple of weeks later I felt she had made peace with her choice to place her baby with us.  I hope no matter where you are the adoption process that you can step back from your own feelings and really think what it must be like to be on the other end.  The amount of time you have waited to be parents will pale in comparison to the years she will be without her child.

Approval Process for Couples

The first step in applying with Inheritance Adoptions is to download the information packet provided on this website. Once you determine that you fit our qualifications and are interested in working with us, then you can download the application packet and send it in along with $100.00. You will be notified of acceptance into the home study process of the agency. Your interviews will be scheduled and the home visit completed. You will also be required to attend adoptive couple training that is offered on a quarterly basis and costs $100.00 to attend. Once the home visit is complete and you are approved, your profile will begin showing to prospective birth mothers.

Expectations of Future Contact

Inheritance Adoptions bases all decisions on what is best for the child. We believe that ongoing contact between adoptive families and birth families depends on mutual trust between both parties. At minimal, we expect pictures and letters to be sent through the agency monthly for the first year. We also expect the adoptive families to send pictures and letters to the agency annually until the child is 18.

Cost of Adoption

Inheritance Adoptions believes in making adoption available to anyone with a desire to parent a child in need. Our placement fee of $12,000.00 is one of the lowest in the industry and is based on the tax benefits available. The average cost is between 15000 and 16000, as outlined in the fee schedule. We also have a Special Needs Assistance Program for those couples willing to adopt harder to place children.

Legal Issues of Termination

The birth mother of the child is not allowed to sign voluntary relinquishment papers until 48 hours after the child's birth. The couple typically will begin caring for the child during the hospital stay and may even leave the hospital with the child before the 48 hour period is over. Legal issues of the birth father can be more complicated. The birth father can sign a Waiver of Interest before the baby is born or a Voluntary Relinquishment after the baby is born. If the birth father has not signed and we know where he is, then we can serve him papers letting him know that we are planning to terminate his rights. He has until the first Monday past twenty days of being served to file an answer to the court. If he does not file an answer, then we can proceed with the termination hearing. If he does file an answer, then we decide whether to proceed with trying to involuntarily terminate his rights. If we do not know anything about him or where he is located, then we will utilize the paternity registry to terminate his rights. Every case is different and legal issues are always unique to the case.

Dear Prospective Parents,

As I take a deep breath, and try to put words on paper about our story of adoption, I wonder if I can do it justice.  Our story begins like many others.  We had dreams and aspirations when we first got married.  Jim and I got married in 2005, and because we are an older couple we started to work on getting pregnant right away.  Six months traveled by at the speed of light.  We told ourselves "we will not be fanatics about it, it is not like I am going to start taking my temperature every morning."  Right!  After 6 months of trying and not succeeding I started taking my temperature every morning to try and pin down exactly when I was ovulating.  Just before our first anniversary we tried invitro-fertilization.  The doctors implanted 2 eggs and two weeks later we learned our fate...it was unsuccessful.  We were ill prepared for how devastating that was going to be.  I was depressed for months.  I did not want to try to get pregnant for a long time, but deep down I wanted God to reward me for giving my life over to Him and by "rewarding" I meant getting pregnant.  Because of the stress of the unsuccessful invitro, Jim and I had a rough time in our marriage.  This is not uncommon among infertile couples.  We ended up being so frustrated that we started taking out the frustration on each other.  Your spouse becomes your personal punching bag for the lack of control you feel.  Yes, we all know that God is in control, but I believe that many women of infertile couples ask God "why did you make me a woman who desires to be a mother if you are not going to grant me that joy?" 

Jim and I continued to let month after month go by while silently hoping that we would become pregnant but we didn't want to talk to each other about it.  It was our elephant in the room.  Every "time of the month" would come and I would experience great heartache.  So many nights I spent crying into my pillow.  After a year passed we started to dialogue about children.  We spoke with our infertility specialists and agreed that we would do an IUI (inter-uterine insemination).  This is a procedure that is, compared to IVF, a breeze.  We went on to complete and fail four IUI procedures.  Again, I would ask God "Why?"

In April of 2008 I ran into a woman whom I have known since I was a child.  I do not specifically keep in touch with her; however, we see each other maybe once a year at someone's gathering.  She and I were talking and she said to me "you have really been on my heart lately, I was wondering if I could pray with you?"  Now, if someone wants to pray with me I am down with that and frankly, can't wait.  She called the prayer a soaking prayer.  I told her about everything that was happening in my marriage and also our failed attempts at trying to conceive a child. We then prayed and she felt the Holy Spirit tell her that Jim and I were to stop using science to have a child and that the Lord was almost chuckling at our feeble attempts. She said that I was to trust Him that it was to happen all in His timing.  As if I haven't heard that before?  However, I left that soaking prayer refreshed in His Spirit.  After that meeting we stopped all "trying" including all fertility specialists help.  

God has such a sense of humor sometimes.  He had me in His hand the whole time.  When I let go and let God, EVERYTHING started to fall into place!  The very next month my mom was informed of this awesome adoption agency right in her hometown of Wichita Falls.  Jim and I had been talking about the possibility of adoption for a year. Although, when we first began talking about it, we had the feeling "adoption was not really us and we will most likely get pregnant..."  But as the days turned into months and months turned into years, it became more and more evident that adoption was our answer to becoming parents.  It was coming to fruition.   I then went to the website of Inheritance Adoptions and downloaded the application.  The application is 35 pages long and it took me 6 weeks to fill it out.  In July of 2008 we made our first trip to Texas to attend meet with the agency. 

We were in a meeting with two other couples.  Someone once said to me, "Infertility is like a special club.  Unless your infertile, you can't grasp the feeling of desperation.  The heartache can not be compared.  The endless questions to your Father.  Other people may empathize but that is as far as it goes."  So when we were in our meeting with these two other couples, their stories were the same.  Their tears were tears we had shed, and more that we shed together.

We spent the day much like an orientation.  We all briefly got to know one another, we were schooled on the agency, we met birth mothers, and adoptive couples who shared their experiences respectfully.  We left with so much more information and it was really wonderful to be encouraged in the direction of adoption.  We learned that Inheritance is a ministry and doing God's work and we were humbled and glad to be a part of that.   We were instructed that if we wanted to continue on then there were steps we needed to take.  

When we arrived back in Florida, we just continued on with our lives.  We created our profile book and sent it to the agency.  We were informed that it could take anywhere from 6 months to a year to have a placement.  For the first time in a long time Jim and I felt freedom.  Freedom of resting in God's arms, feeling that we were in sync with His divine plan for us.  We did not "wait by the phone", we did not purchase things for a nursery, we did not worry and fret about when the Lord was going to bring us our child through adoption. It was wonderful to just be still and know that He is God and if adoption was how He was choosing for us to be parents, we would patiently wait. 

In November of 2008 Leslie called me in the middle of me cooking dinner.  Honestly, I had not plugged the agency's number into my phone so when she said "Hi, it's Leslie"  it took me about 10 seconds to figure out who she was.  "OH YES, of course, Leslie!"  Fortunately, she was actually happy I didn't remember right away.  She told me of a young girl who was interested in meeting us.  We then went on to set up a phone interview.  The phone interview made both my husband and I nervous and our birthmom was nervous as well.  We enjoyed the phone interview and then went on to set a time to fly to Texas to meet with the young girl.  In an already overbooked and busy December, we were able to squeeze in a weekend trip to Texas.  It was one of the most important trips of our lives. 

Facilitated by the agency, we went with Misty and met our birthmom and her extended family for what was their Christmas gathering.  She was a doll!  Her parents and family were overwhelmingly gracious to us.  We were relieved and elated that she had chosen us to be the parents of her baby.  Her precious baby was coming very soon...the very next month.  Almost in disbelief, but quite giddy at the wonderful news that we were going to parents to a new baby in January, we traveled back to Florida in a complete blur.  Jim and I could not stop buzzing about our new addition to our family. 

We spent the next 3 weeks celebrating the birth of our King, New Year's, and the fact that a new baby was on its way into our family.  Our birthmom's name was Julie.  She gave me her cell phone number and we fast became texting buddies.  We chatted everyday about anything and everything.  It was evident that we were going to love her, not solely on the fact that she was going to be the birthmom to our baby, but love her for who she is as a person.  She is a good girl, who has a heart for God; is respectful and mindful of other people's feelings...we just adored her! 

January 22, 2009 was the due date of our child to be born.  Julie and I lovingly refer to the baby as "ours," because she is.  Our baby was born on her due date. Julie graciously allowed me to be in the delivery room, cut the baby's cord, and be the first person to hold our baby.  I was honored to watch Julie labor over the birth of our child.  She was so strong and so sweet.  No yelling at people like you see in the movies.  She was nothing short of awesome.  When we went to the nursery with our baby, we looked outside the windows and so many of Julie’s family were there looking in, smiling, laughing, crying and taking pictures---I felt like they were the paparazzi!  We soon named our baby Reese and she was PRECIOUS from the moment she was born.  We are SO IN LOVE with her.  Tying it all together, was that Reese was born in January which means she was conceived in April, the exact month I had that soaking prayer with my friend.

Julie allowed us the wonderful experience of keeping the baby in our room at the hospital.  Reese has been in our arms from the moment she was born, thanks to our birthmom Julie.  Julie texted me the night Reese was born to find out room we were staying in.  I answered her back stating our room number and that we would see her first thing in the morning.  I also told her that I was so proud of her.  She worked so hard and did such a fantastic job delivering our baby.  She texted me back saying, "Thank you but I did it all for you."  I was so touched by her heartfelt words. 

The next few days in the hospital were wonderful.  I didn't really know what I was doing with our newborn, so the nurses and the doctor were great at giving me tips and assuring me that everything I was doing and witnessing with this great, little but big miracle in my arms was normal.  Julie and I frequently visited each other's hospital rooms like girls at summer camp.  I carted the baby down to see her in her room and she came to see me in mine.  Julie was surrounded by her family.  They played a key part in supporting Julie in her adoption decision.  She was only 15 years old when she gave birth to Reese.   She was mature enough to know that she was too young to care properly for a child at the time.  She made the best decision for her, and in doing so she made the best decision for us, as well.  We had prayed and prayed to be parents to a child.  God answered our prayers by giving us our child who was born of another woman. 

We had to stay in the hospital with baby Reese longer than Julie. The doctor wanted to keep an eye on Reese.  Julie gave birth on Thursday and left on Saturday.  We did not leave until Sunday when Reese was cleared with a clean bill of health.  I must tell you that I experienced great grief when Julie left that day.  She left with her family, all 18 of them, I swear...and I just could not stop crying.  Julie had given me the greatest gift and then ...she left.  It was a weird experience.  I had a daughter now.  I could not conceive a child but now thanks to this young girl, I had one.  Julie had no idea the wonder of what she had done for me.  I could not conceive and carry my own child, and yet this incredibly brave young girl gave birth for me. It was an unbelievably humbling experience.

I spoke with Leslie that night who assured me that the depression I felt was normal.  I will be forever connected to this young woman who gave birth to my child.  I then waited by my phone.  I waited until Julie would text me.  I felt like she was my boyfriend.  I couldn't wait to hear from her everyday and would get quite giddy when I did hear from her. 
I spent two weeks in Texas at my mom's house with our newborn baby.  Julie came by to visit and even stayed over night once.  We took turns holding the baby, taking a million pictures of the baby, even watched a few movies. 

We continue to keep in touch even now 6 months later but it is not as often.  She is free to call, text, or email anytime.  I will gladly send her pictures via cell phone anytime she asks and even send cute pictures of our baby even when she doesn't ask...how could I not share this precious cuteness? 

For Mother's Day we sent her flowers and we got a sweet card from her.  I pray that God is watching over Julie and that she makes it into the military to become a nurse once she graduates high school.  My prayers for her mirror my prayers for our daughter.  That
God would be the center in her life, that she may dream big, marry a Godly man, and have as many children as God desires for her.

I hope this letter gives all waiting Moms and Dads encouragement in the adoption process.  God has chosen us to be special parents.  God decides the heartbeat of a child.  He has picked another birthmom to house that heartbeat, until the child is born.  He then chooses you to be their forever parents.  A perfect privilege.   Now ask yourselves, "How AWESOME is that?"

Love in Christ,
Elizabeth and Jim

We first came to Inheritance in September of 1997. We were heartbroken and desperate for a baby. We started the adoption process, not knowing how long or if we would ever get a baby. We had a failed adoption (not with Inheritance) in November of that year. We were still hoping for a baby and were still working with Inheritance.

In January of 1998, we received the best phone call ever! Inheritance had birthparents that wanted to meet us. The baby was already born and they wanted us to be his parents. We were very scared and nervous, but we knew we would never get a baby without taking another emotional risk.

We met the couple at Inheritance. We felt the meeting went well, but they wanted time to think about it. Later that night, we got the call that changed our lives. They chose us to be our son’s parents. We were so excited. The next day we brought our son home.

When our son was 18 months old, we once again decided we wanted another baby. We decided to go with Inheritance again because the adoption of our son went so smoothly. We started the process again in July of 1999. We again didn’t know how long it would take or if it would happen. In October of that same year, we got the call that we were chosen and a birth mother wanted to meet us. We were shocked! We didn’t think it would be that quick. We made plans for a meeting the next day. We were called early the next morning. The meeting place was changed. We would meet our birth mother at the hospital because she was in labor. Again we were in shock. Inheritance was with us all day and they were very supportive. They knew how stressful this whole process was on us, so they waited with us and they had even waited until the last moment to tell us about being chosen just in case. Our baby girl was born that evening. I was in the delivery room which was so exciting. I actually got to witness the birth of my baby girl! As you can imagine, we were so excited. Everything went smooth once again.

We felt like our family was complete until our daughter was about 2. We decided to once again contact Inheritance about adopting a 3 rd baby. In January of 2002 we got a call about a baby. Before we had even had time to decide, the baby was born. Not long after we brought the baby home, the birth mother changed her mind. We were devastated again, but we were so thankful for our 2 precious children God had already blessed us with. In July of 2002, we were chosen once again. We didn’t know if to get our hopes up or even tell anyone. We met the birth parents and started planning for another girl. We were still very apprehensive. After 3 long months, our baby girl was born in October of 2002. We were so excited to bring her home. We finally felt like our family was complete.

Adoption can be the most heartbreaking and the most wonderful event that can happen to a family. Adoption is a very stressful process, but the reward is indescribable. We love our children so much that we forget they aren’t ours biologically. We feel very blessed by God that he had given us 3 wonderful, beautiful, healthy and bright children. We are so thankful for Inheritance and all the support they gave us through those years. We really believe without Inheritance, we would not have been able to afford to adopt 3 children and that we wouldn’t have the family that we have now.

Thank you Inheritance for our family!